Here’s this week’s photo prompt for the Friday Fictioneers, see http://madisonwoods.wordpress.com/2012/03/07/photo-prompt-for-100-word-flash-fridayfictioneers-21/
The thing in the cellar is becoming stronger; at night I hear it shuffling restlessly, keening softly, the murmur of a thousand lost souls.
The elders warned me, centuries ago: “The spell will not hold forever. You must be watchful. And ready.”
Today I must act. I have procrastinated too long; the thing must be silenced.
As I peer through the observation hole, fear strikes at the heart of my being. I am too late.
At this moment, around the world, death and destruction are being unleashed upon the innocent. And the high pitched keening of a thousand souls swells by thousands more.
Wow, well done. A sense of fantasy and history and all kinds of things to come.
Mine:
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting Judee.
LikeLike
Apocalypse argh! Loved it. Very dramatic ‘fear strikes at the heart of my being’ and the beast ‘keening’ sounds mournful and sad. Just goes to show you should do your tasks straight-away, before they end the world…
My Lovecraftian effort over here: http://joannakneilson.wordpress.com/2012/03/09/flash-fiction-friday-cellar-wall/
LikeLike
Procrastination is the thief of time, as they say … thanks for commenting Joanna.
LikeLike
That first line sent shivers down my spine. Another great tale!
LikeLike
Thanks! 🙂
LikeLike
Oh, wow, [shudder], that was creepy and good and creepy and really good.
LikeLike
Thank you, glad you liked it.
LikeLike
“Keening.” What a wonderful word. Thank you for sharing this horrifically creepy story with us.
Here’s mine:
http://sarahthestoryteller.wordpress.com
LikeLike
Thanks Sarah, enjoyed yours too.
LikeLike
Ewwww—shivers! Good story! I’d like to read more of what happens next!! What is it with cellars and creepiness? LOL But they go hand in hand so well…;)
Here is mine: it is a prose poem rather than a story:
http://thewriternubbin.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/photo-prompt-for-100-word-flash-fridayfictioneers-moving-on/
LikeLike
I think most of us went with the spooky stuff. 🙂 Thanks for commenting, enjoyed the prose.
LikeLike
Obviously this picture brings out in the creeps in the Fictioneers! I loved the beauty and menace of the final line.
I’m over here http://elmowrites.wordpress.com/2012/03/09/friday-fictioneers-16/
LikeLike
Glad you liked it. Thanks for commenting.
LikeLike
Hi Sandra,
Damn, if only the keeper had been more diligent, this world-wide crisis would never have happened! I thought the story was imbued with a mystical, magical quality and I think this could be the beginning of a great monster story. Thanks for your comments on my story.
LikeLike
Sounds like Pandora’s box has been opened. Is there no hope?
Nice piece, very well written.
Thanks for visiting mine, Sandra.
here’s the link for others http://russellgayer.blogspot.com/
LikeLike
Oh there’s sure to be someone who can deal with this … 🙂 Thanks.
LikeLike
A warning to all procrastinators, never put off till tomorrow what can be done today!
Here’s mine: http://postcardfiction.com/2012/03/09/waiting/
LikeLike
Procrastination, the thief of time … Thanks for commenting.
LikeLike
Such horrors lurk in cellars everywhere in our imaginations, so bringing it to life sends shivers down the spine! I do love a good bit of horror and creepiness.
Great story!
If anyone fancies a read of mine:
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting, glad you liked it.
LikeLike
Dear Sandra,
I loved The Thief of Time from the very first sentence and especially your initial use of the word, ‘keening’. A very good story fraught with peril and an undercurrent of fear induced by the knowledge that we might not know all that we think we do; that other creatures may hold sway in these turbulent times and that there is nothing we can do. Caught up in your spell, I was shaken out of it by your repetition of ‘keening’ toward the end. It’s impact would be doubled by using it only once, in either the beginning or the end, but not in both places. I feel strongly about this or would not have mentioned it.
Great, great story.
Aloha,
Doug
LikeLike
Good point Doug. I repeated it purposely but I’ll have a think about an alternative. Thanks for commenting. Have visited yours and commented.
LikeLike
Wonderful end of the world piece. They never go out of style.
Here’s mine: http://teschoenborn.com/2012/03/09/friday-fictioneers/
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. 🙂
LikeLike
Ahhhh…my own personal demon – procrastination. Maybe I should take this as a warning and get to taming all of the beasts I’ve been ignoring for so long. The symbolism in this one speaks to me…thank you for sharing.
~Susan (Here’e mine: http://www.susanwenzel.com/)
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. 🙂
LikeLike
Goodness, this is very intense. I am glad I don’t live in the narrator’s world — or maybe I do and the keening just hasn’t reached me yet -? Uhhh… no please.
Nice writing 🙂
Mine is here: http://thecolorlime.wordpress.com/2012/03/09/imprisoned/
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. Keep your ears pricked … 🙂
LikeLike
Like our title Thief of Time. Interesting take on your version of the end of the world… “Revelation” …Here’s mine: http://www.triplemoonstar.blogspot.com
LikeLike
Lora, I’ve been trying to comment on yours but I can’t get it to publish. I thought it was very good, a nicely thought out presentation. I’ll try again later.
LikeLike
That was scary. The sense of impending doom. And the disappointment in failing to act. I almost feel the weight of the non action myself. Thanks for the look in my blog
http://remakingme-atiyatownes.blogspot.com/2012/03/flash-fiction-is-out-and-its-chilling.html
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. The man has a lot to answer for! 🙂
LikeLike
I think there must be something wrong with me because I so enjoy the darker side of our imaginations. There’s a whole ‘rest of the story’ waiting at the end of yours. Somehow your mc will have to put the beast either back in the cellar or to rest eternally. That’s a story I’d read if I got the feeling there’d be hope at achieving either end.
LikeLike
Thanks Madison. I’m not hot on straightforward ‘happy endings’ so I think the beast will have to be consigned to eternal rest. 🙂
LikeLike
Well, I’m one of those people who avoid scary movies and this would make me get the shivers. I like it, though. Very nicely done. Thanks for your kind comments about my entry. 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks for popping by and commenting. 🙂
LikeLike
Your first and last lines tie things together nicely. Well done!
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. Appreciate your dropping by.
LikeLike
WOW–the goosebumps are running all over me. Deliciously intense–very well done.
Mine: vlgregory-circa1800.vpweb.com/blog.html.
LikeLike
Whoops! http://www.vlgregory-circa1800.vpweb.com/blog.html.
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting, glad you enjoyed it.
LikeLike
I want to know what happens next! How is he going to fix it. This demonstrates the importance of acting quickly.
LikeLike
What makes you think the MC is a ‘he’? 🙂 Thanks for commenting, not sure how he/she will fix it yet, maybe it’s too late.
LikeLike
Wow. Just shows what problems can arise through procrastination.
A great read.
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting Mike.
LikeLike
Hmmm, a well told tale almost a fable – niicely done.
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. Pleased you liked it.
LikeLike
The horror implied by that last line is chilling. I have no idea what was in the cellar, though I’m having fun imagining. At the moment, I’m imagining a Lovecraft connection. Well, either that or this:
LikeLike
I’d go for the Lovecraft connection Jake. Not that the alternative isn’t … er … arresting. 🙂 🙂
LikeLike
I was reminded of Pandora’s box while reading. I particularly liked the last paragraph. Very apocalyptic.
LikeLike
Thanks for commenting. I suppose it does have Pandora’s box overtones; I hadn’t thought of it like that when I was writing it.
LikeLike
A very chilling tale and well-told. I think you have quite a knack for the darker side of storytelling ;D
My drabble from last week is here: http://quillshiv.wordpress.com/2012/03/12/orientation/
LikeLike
I loved this story, very Lovecraftian in tone. What a great use of the prompt. We’ll all be hearing the keening of a thousand lost souls for some time… Very well written
LikeLike