Little Big Man (Five Sentence Fiction, July 2012)

Lillie McFerrin’s prompt for Five Sentence Fiction this week was the word ‘Composure’.

It wasn’t working out quite like he’d expected; his quarry seemed to know she was being followed, and far from scurrying ahead in fear, she strolled jauntily, occasionally glancing over her shoulder, as if she were more worried about losing him.

Tightening his grip around the knife in his jacket pocket, adrenalin pumping at the prospect of the struggle to come, he was taken aback when the woman in front suddenly spun round and waited for him, her lips compressed into a tight line like a newly-stitched operation scar.

“You haven’t changed a bit have you, Billy Palmer, still sneaking around, playing with knives, trying to scare people half to death with your creepy little habits.  Now you just put that knife away and get your pitiful little backside over here this minute.”

Billy gulped, his legs turning to jelly, guts churning just as they had done thirty years ago, as he reluctantly shambled forward to stand before the coolly imperious gaze of Miss Eleanor Mitchell from Green Valley Elementary School.

About Sandra

I used to cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and wrote fiction and poetry. Now I live on the beautiful Dorset coast, enjoying the luxury of being able to have a cat, cultivating an extensive garden and getting involved in the community. I still write fiction, but only when the spirit moves me - which isn't as often as before. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
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15 Responses to Little Big Man (Five Sentence Fiction, July 2012)

  1. Carole Grant says:

    you’re not talking to yourself!!

    Like

  2. ahblack57 says:

    Never underestimate the power of your elementary school teacher! Loved it as usual…

    Like

  3. Sisyphus47 says:

    Little boys always bow to their Mistress 🙂 lovely post, just right…

    Like

  4. “your creepy little habits” I can imagine how startled Billy would have been. A wonderful scene, Sandra. I like the way you’ve structured it too. I always learn something about writing when I read you great stories!

    Like

  5. Ha! Got you Billy Palmer!
    I love the attention to detail. Jo-Anne is right, there’s always something to learn when I visit your place.

    Like

  6. How interesting that we both wrote about strong women turning the tables on their stalker. I love that his was a former teacher and reduced him to the “pitiful” kid he once was and, apparently, still is. Good job.

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  7. Made me smile! Billy gets his comeuppance…and loved her cool imperious gaze!

    Like

  8. susan cottrill says:

    I wonder, was it her that made him that way to start with!

    Like

  9. beebeesworld says:

    I think my greatest surprise in this challenge is how much a writer can get into 5 sentences, that in itself takes talent! Great job!

    Like

I'd love to hear your views; it reassures me I'm not talking to myself.

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