Copyright Kent Bonham
As is my usual practice with Friday Fictioneers, I dispense with the first inspiration that springs to mind, on the basis that everyone will have the same idea. So if no-one does a ‘ladies of the night’ theme I shall be extremely annoyed. 🙂
Thanks again to our gracious host for her weekly ministrations as we grow in numbers each week. And she manages to comment on just about every one. Well done, Rochelle.
Ramps…how considerate!
Expediency probably – a prisoner might secure his freedom by the pitching of the tumbrel.
Cheers or jeers? No matter.
I watch him climb the steps, kneel, and for a moment his eyes hold mine.
A clang… it is done.
Thirteen seconds they say; not instantaneous, not painless, but what care they, these savages whose ‘liberty’ frees them to murder without pause or justification?
A widow for the briefest time, I stumble up the steps … a hand steadies with a last act of kindness.
The blade shrieks.
My eyes swivel to watch them blanch as I slowly smile… eleven, twelve, thirteen…
castelsarrasin 
Dear Sandra,
Your story made me gasp and most grateful you didn’t write a “ladies of the night” story. Well done as always.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks Rochelle! Have a great weekend.
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thrilling to the end!
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Literally! 🙂 Thanks Nandini.
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Very heavy story. Interesting point of view, from a soon to be severed head and a grim take on the prompt. Another good one.
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Thanks Linda, glad you liked it.
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I loved this. So many lines were perfect – if not all of them – but especially, ‘A widow for the briefest time’ and ‘the blade shrieks’. You got her fierce and angry state of mind in so few words. Wonderful.
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Thanks Claire, appreciate your comments. 🙂
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Grim, unexpected, and very eloquently done.
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Thank you!
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Excellent! So much story in so few words.
When I was thinking of and rejecting story lines, a ladies-of-the-night scenario was never one of them. We shall wait and see. I’m glad you went with this one.
janet
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Thank you Janet, enjoy your weekend.
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Very, very good! The link ties it all together.
DJ
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Thanks Danny, glad you liked it.
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Nice take on the prompt! I had the “ladies of the night” story stuck in my head before I read any of the posts, so I went with it. It looks like there are two themes emerging this week.
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I enjoyed your story. Thanks for reading mine.
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Powerful stuff this, Sandra. Perhaps I am a slow reader today – it took me a few moments to really ‘get’ it, but once I did, so many great lines. I’m another one glad you went away from your first thought. This one stands out!
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Thanks Jennifer. I read Tale of Two Cities when I was about ten years old, and the horror of the guillotine stayed with me. Glad you liked it.
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Oh, that’s fantastic. Brief widows of the revolution. I got shivers! True sang-froide, this one.
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Thank you Helena! 🙂
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I always tend to stick with my first thought as my brain seems to work differently from most i.e. very rarely does anyone else have my first thought 🙂 Good job with the story.
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You’re very lucky then Paul, I have to work hard at finding a different take. Thanks for reading.
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powerful lines, loved it 🙂
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Thank you Helen 🙂
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This was great! I loved the phrase “A widow for the briefest time”.
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Thank you! Yes, I liked that phrase, it came late in the process for me this week.
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Sandra, that’s diabolically good. Rich story. Lots o’ good stuff in there. Brilliant!
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Thanks Kent, and great photo!
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Grim story told with an air of detachment which makes it even more dizzying. Nicely done.
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Detachment! 🙂 I like what you did there 🙂 Thanks.
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Hi Sandra,
You’re not only raising castles, you’re raising the hairs on the back of my neck. Ron
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You need a neck-shave then Ron, and I think I know where you can get one… though perhaps it’s a bit extreme…
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And I’m to watch Sleepy Hollow on the DVR in a few moments. How fitting.
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Thanks for reading JK. 🙂
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Demonic!
You scared me!
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Sometimes I scare myself Dawn 😦
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😉
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OMG, terrifying! I’m not so sure I’m glad I read the link at the end, but the story was terrific!
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No, it was a bit graphic there. Thanks for reading Perry! 🙂
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My view is that I enjoyed the story quite a bit.
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/11/13/5564/
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Thank you Scott.
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Oh!! A widow for the briefest time…very brief, indeed. Gruesome but extremely effective!
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Thanks for reading Jan!
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Oooh creepy! I love creepy… 🙂 I especially loved that he smiled before his ‘numbers’ were up. Very clever!
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Thanks for reading Deanna 🙂
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A totally unexpected ending and extremely well executed story, Sandra. Brilliant.
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Well executed… love that! 🙂
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Wonderful voice, powerful content.
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Thank you!
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This is a chilling story. Very well written. I also clicked on the link afterwards. It’s creepy to think that the ‘head’ is still aware, however briefly!
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Isn’t it just? Thanks for reading Steve.
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Masterfully done to describe the character’s final moments … while she kept on reasoning, even after her husband died, I was trembling. Thankfully, I still have my head — and now it has the meaning of “tumbrel” in it after I Googled it.
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You’ve not read Tale of Two Cities then? It’s a good read, full of tumbrels. 🙂
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I haven’t yet read Tale of Two Cities — tho I have enjoyed Dickens a great deal.
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Great story and unique take on the prompt as well as an interesting link. You were most successful in building the mood and “executing” your ending. Well done, Sandra.
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🙂 Thanks vb.
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Well told and an informative link. We should all carry oxygen tanks.
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I’m not sure they’d help in this case. Thanks for reading Patrick.
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What a skilfully crafted piece Sandra!Loved the way you unfolded the story step by step and the icing on the cake was that totally unexpected end -I salute the writer in you!
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Many thanks, just glad you enjoyed it.
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🙂
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i swear i HEARD the blade shriek! excellent tale.ps i almost wrote a ladies-of-the-night scenario but also decided against it.lol 🙂
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🙂 Thanks for reading kz; hope all is well with you.
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I just checked out whether your 13 seconds was based on fact and now I feel sick! A gruesome tale this week. I like the multimedia image of the shrieking blade. Also uncanny. I’ve just bought a new computer as my old one’s sound has gone ‘funny’ – it has started to ‘whine’ and when I pushed the lid back and forth, it was squealing – through the sound system! Freaked me out that my laptop might be in pain, dying. I MUST get a grip on myself! Ann
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Sorry about the gruesome, I never know where it’s going until I get started. 🙂 Poor laptop – get well soon.
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Thanks! Ann
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Dear Sandra,
Your consistent output of unique and varied stories puts us all to shame. When I read the word ‘tumbrel’ I knew what was coming, yet still the phrase, ‘briefly a widow’ slammed me in the gut. What a fantastic story. I have chills running up and down my back and arms. You are good…and a delight to read. Thank you for your continued presence in the group.
Aloha,
Doug
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Thank you Doug, I’m indeed honoured to be part of the group. So glad you liked the story – I try to chase a different theme each week but must admit that the slightly shivery type of story holds more attraction than most. And Tale of Two Cities was probably one of the early stories that stirred an interest in reading and writing – I sooo empathised with those poor aristos. 😦 Even at the age of 10.
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Sandra, I haven’t read too many “ladies of the evening” stories. Not yet! Every word in your story is so exquisitely chosen. I’m hanging onto every word. Masterful!
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No there weren’t too many, Amy. I could have ventured in that direction I guess. Still…never look back. Thanks for reading.
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Chilling, fine writing. You hold the tension through each line and then leave us gasping. Really well done! House guests left made it impossible to read sooner… but my, how i’m enjoying it now!
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Thank you! Hope you had a nice weekend. And now for the tidying up….
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Lots of tidying up! And lots of catching up. Feh.
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Nice! Each line was well-crafted!
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‘ A Tale of Two Cities’ is, I think, my favourite Charles Dickens novel. When I read tumbrel I wondered what was coming and you didn’t disappoint
Such a well crafted story, lots of tension, well done as usual
Dee
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Great story, superbly written.
AnElephant loves it, even if he does not share your views on ‘poor aristos’.
Vive la Revolution!
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