Rapartee – Friday Fictioneers (November 2014)

Copyright Randie Maize

When one of his more able pupils declared an intention to pursue a career in ‘Meejah Studies,’ Mr Penworthy tried to deflect him into ‘Library Sciences’.

“Nah, I fough’ ‘bou’ i’ Sir; but ‘snot fer me. I’s a communicay’ah.”

Mr Penworthy, now long-since retired, pours a sherry, and turns on the television.

“An dat’s da end of da news,
did it give yous all the blues?
Fer a lickle bit more sorrow,
fink ‘bout comin’ back tomorrow…”

The all too familiar face of the news-rapper fades, as heavy-metal music segues into adverts.

Mr Penworthy sighs; the sooner he’s out of this life the better.

The blue frog has today put in a rare appearance on Rochelle’s Friday Fictioneers page, or at least it was there when I looked ten minutes ago.  I communicated with the nice lady at Inlinkz 😦   It’s all WordPress’ fault, apparently.  The fact that the problem only started when we were required to ‘sign in’ to Inlinkz has nothing to do with it.  Clearly, she says, WordPress instigated some change at the same time.  There’s even less point in trying to locate the elusive ‘Happiness Engineer’ at WordPress – life is too short.  After a week of trying to understand this problem, the inability to leave a ping-back from my own site and Firefox’s repeated nervous breakdowns, I’ve had it with computers for a while.  I’m not even going to try to leave a blue frog on my page today …

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About Sandra

I cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and write fiction and poetry. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
This entry was posted in Friday Fictioneers, Just Sayin' and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

70 Responses to Rapartee – Friday Fictioneers (November 2014)

  1. Seems from a career point meejah was the right choice.. Maybe just as well that he didn’t could go in and cause havoc in the libraries.. hope they are still standing..

    Like

  2. My dear Sandra,

    I wish there was more I could do about the technical problems. Very frustrating indeed.

    I feel Mr. Penworthy’s pain. I hear a lot of English spoken as a second language…by people born here. Recently a local reporter interviewed the owner of a boutique. As the affected little blonde shared her wares she held up a pretty metallic number and said, “This one’s more dressier for evening.” Gah!

    And where I work I’m often asked, “Can I git a cake wrote on?”

    Suffice it to say I love your take on the prompt.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

  3. Sandra says:

    This weekend I watched ten minutes of utter rap drivel summarising the Formula One racing year. I had to leave the room – I was practically tearing my hair out, but at least it provided me with inspiration for this week’s Friday Fictioneers. I love ‘can I git a cake wrote on?’. 🙂 Thanks for dropping by Rochelle.

    Like

  4. Sandra, Good story with a type of dark humor. As a former teacher who taught reading and writing, I just hope they know how to read and write properly even though their work doesn’t always show it. I accept that work as a form of art, popular with some, but not with me. Well written as usual. 🙂 — Susan

    Like

    • Sandra says:

      Don’t get me started, Susan. 🙂 The other day I saw a headline on a respected (in terms of standards, not politically) national daily newspaper here that said something like “Minister remains unphased by …” I was just about to share it on FB when thankfully it was taken down and a corrected version submitted in its place. I suppose that at least is gratifying – other newspapers remain ‘unphased’ by their errors. 🙂

      Liked by 3 people

  5. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear Sandra,

    News rapper. I love the concept. Never have understood why that format fought on….unless it’s just that people are….never mind. I often think the same thing as Mr. Penworthy regarding checking out of this world. Wonderful dialect, perfect sentiment.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    Like

    • Sandra says:

      Hi Doug. My father used to say that last phrase a lot. It used to irritate me intensely, but I see where he was coming from now. Loved your offering this week – mega mate. 😉

      Like

  6. Unfortunately, I am with Mr.Penworthy. The things you hear on TV these days…Your story is very accurate.
    As for the little blue devil, try to copy this into your post, under the text:

    When I encountered the problem first time, I refused to sing in and looked around for another solution. So, I went to my older posts, copied the part with InLinkz script and just replaced the numbers with the new set of numbers that are visible every week when you click on Rochelle’s blue frog. Just be sure to change both sets of numbers. I think this should work. Hope this will help.

    Like

  7. Sandra says:

    The problem is that Rochelle’s blue frog hasn’t been appearing so I can’t click on it. So I’ve no way of uploading a link unless I can remember the url for someone else’s blog that might show the blue frog. (Some do, some don’t) The Inlinkz code is on Rochelle’s page but then that requires me to sign in and go through a loop that sometimes has ended up at the links page, but other times not. When I tried to test it again last weekend, the sign in screen went to a message that said my password/user was invalid and to click for a new password. So I did, several times without any success – no communication was received back. And then the next time I tried I got logged in and everything proceeded normally. Everything looks normal today, but I just don’t feel up to pursuing the inlinkz code to put the blue frog on my page. Enough, as they say, is enough for now. Maybe next week. 🙂 Thanks for the help, and for commenting.

    Like

  8. Nevah giv up de fight, de-ah Sandra,
    You got de spit, we hav t’hand ya.

    (But what is da Meejah mean? i be lost wid dat word?)
    Rand-ya

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sandra says:

      Media Studies? Fewer and fewer kids over here are pursuing the sciences, languages or literature in favour of Media Studies. Oh… and Performing Arts too… Incidentally there is no ‘h’; in hand, not any more. Tanks for droppin’ by. Did I mention we don’t do ‘th’ any more?

      Like

  9. My sympathies to Mr. Penworthy. It’s “gawdawful” what you read and hear these days.

    Like

  10. When we reach that stage, I’m going to switch out the lights. Lovely name for a teacher, Penworthy – good creation.

    Like

  11. wmqcolby says:

    As they used to say
    Back in the day
    Class with a capital K.
    Hee-hee! Really fun story, Sandra! I could read it fine, no problems. And I agree with Penworthy . Appropriate name I’d say.

    Like

  12. paulmclem says:

    You sound like me i.e. getting old and further removed from what’s trendy. I’m sure we’ll both agree it was better in our day 🙂

    Like

  13. Ur story was amazeballs, obvs.

    Like

  14. Sandra says:

    Amazeballs schmazeballs. I have a gun and am prepared to use it… 🙂

    Like

  15. Ha! That is a fun write. The rapper newsreader… I wish it never comes to that.
    An enjoyable read. 🙂
    -HA

    Like

  16. Wonderful use of phonetics. It really fleshes out the character.

    Like

  17. Danny James says:

    Eats, shoots and leaves 🙂

    SJ

    Like

  18. helenmidgley says:

    Great dialogue, loved the ‘news rapper’ 🙂

    Like

  19. As someone who studied meejah as a mature student, I thoroughly enjoyed watching my teachers try to guide some of the younger class members towards a more standardised form of the English language. I loved your story Sandra, particularly the contrasting characters.

    Like

  20. I think you’ve opened up a whole new field of endeavor — news rappers. Here in the U.S. there are hours and hours of pointless repetitive local news (fires, car crashes, etc.) and people think they are watching “news.” It might as well be done by rappers.

    Like

  21. i b arora says:

    while many have forgotten the habit of reading, now i understand some would not even learn to write, they would start with a keyboard

    Like

  22. wildbilbo says:

    That was both hard to read and very entertaining. A great take on the prompt and one that makes me wonder how many teachers I might have driven to alcohol. 🙂

    Cheers
    KT

    Like

  23. draliman says:

    This made me laugh 🙂
    Or maybe I shouldn’t, this could be happening when I’m retired 😦

    Like

  24. You have no idea how much the student’s dialogue sent a shiver down my shiver down my spine. Excellently written

    Like

  25. plaridel says:

    for sure, the times they are a changin’

    Like

  26. Your talent never ceases to surprise and delight me. I love that you are able to see the same photo as me and go in such intriguing and creative directions. This was great!

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Ellespeth says:

    This is one reason I don’t have a television…I don’t think even sherry would get through a news rapper.
    Great dialect.
    Ellespeth

    Like

  28. Margaret says:

    I’m with Mr Penworthy too. I notice your reply above that his last line came from something your father used to say. That’s very touching, and makes me think about how we have these little treasures of words, phrases, maybe images, in our memories of our parents or people in our lives. They’re precious memories. Your story’s very entertaining. I love it.

    Like

  29. I’ve just snorted while reading about your “unphased” Minister – I wonder if the Enterprise had him in a tractor beam? (Sorry to bring Star Trek into your space but I couldn’t resist!)
    Very clever, Sandra, and to be honest, it makes me glad I don’t watch the news…. 😛

    Like

  30. jwdwrites says:

    Great idea Sandra, a really funny little story that had me chuckling out loud. 🙂

    Like

  31. rgayer55 says:

    For a minute, I thought he might be a hillbilly, but he talks too fast and that rhyming stuff really ain’t our style–xcept in cheating songs, of course.

    Like

  32. Sad isn’t it? I no longer subscribe to cable and whenever I do see the newscasters today I want to bang my head against the wall! Great writing.

    Like

  33. subroto says:

    Ha ha. Loved the dialogue. This could be so true..it isn’t right? It’s fiction, yes?

    Like

  34. Oh! Save us all! This was a great take on the prompt.

    Like

  35. Great take on this prompt…I love the dialogue! 🙂

    Like

  36. Jan Brown says:

    Good story!

    I actually think a news rapper would hold my interest more than some of the talking heads on Fox. But I agree with Rochelle that many of my countrymen/women speak as though English is their second (or third or forth) language. Their English teachers may have put forth a valiant effort, but couldn’t compete with their heroes, the pop-culture icons including rappers and singers whose words cannot be heard or understood.

    Like

  37. Nan Falkner says:

    Dear Sandra, Recently, I read some letters written in the early 1800’s. The penmanship was beautiful and ornate as was the poetic verse that the author was writing about. It troubles me that we are “dumbing down” as a society. What will happen in the next hundred years would certainly be unrecognizeable by us if we were to come back. Your story is so well written Sandra, as everything you write is. Hope you had a good Thanksgiving (I know it’s unique to the U.S.) but it is a fun tradition to eat until you are miserable, dote on your grandchildren, and listen to the same old stories for the umpteenth time. It is enjoyable and delicious! Excellent story! Nan 🙂

    Like

  38. News rapper? Now that’s innovative 😀 I confess I can never quite know what to expect from you. But I know it will be great 😀

    Like

  39. Sarah Ann says:

    Poor Mr Penworthy – feeling so bad and wishing his life away. Maybe he should get with the groove, after all, while it’s dire in sentiment and diction, ‘Fer a lickle bit more sorrow,/fink ‘bout comin’ back tomorrow…”’, is also very funny.

    Like

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