Copyright Randie Maize
When one of his more able pupils declared an intention to pursue a career in ‘Meejah Studies,’ Mr Penworthy tried to deflect him into ‘Library Sciences’.
“Nah, I fough’ ‘bou’ i’ Sir; but ‘snot fer me. I’s a communicay’ah.”
Mr Penworthy, now long-since retired, pours a sherry, and turns on the television.
“An dat’s da end of da news,
did it give yous all the blues?
Fer a lickle bit more sorrow,
fink ‘bout comin’ back tomorrow…”
The all too familiar face of the news-rapper fades, as heavy-metal music segues into adverts.
Mr Penworthy sighs; the sooner he’s out of this life the better.
The blue frog has today put in a rare appearance on Rochelle’s Friday Fictioneers page, or at least it was there when I looked ten minutes ago. I communicated with the nice lady at Inlinkz 😦 It’s all WordPress’ fault, apparently. The fact that the problem only started when we were required to ‘sign in’ to Inlinkz has nothing to do with it. Clearly, she says, WordPress instigated some change at the same time. There’s even less point in trying to locate the elusive ‘Happiness Engineer’ at WordPress – life is too short. After a week of trying to understand this problem, the inability to leave a ping-back from my own site and Firefox’s repeated nervous breakdowns, I’ve had it with computers for a while. I’m not even going to try to leave a blue frog on my page today …
castelsarrasin 
Seems from a career point meejah was the right choice.. Maybe just as well that he didn’t could go in and cause havoc in the libraries.. hope they are still standing..
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I think they should be in fine fettle Bjorn; it’s not like anybody goes there these days. 🙂
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My dear Sandra,
I wish there was more I could do about the technical problems. Very frustrating indeed.
I feel Mr. Penworthy’s pain. I hear a lot of English spoken as a second language…by people born here. Recently a local reporter interviewed the owner of a boutique. As the affected little blonde shared her wares she held up a pretty metallic number and said, “This one’s more dressier for evening.” Gah!
And where I work I’m often asked, “Can I git a cake wrote on?”
Suffice it to say I love your take on the prompt.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This weekend I watched ten minutes of utter rap drivel summarising the Formula One racing year. I had to leave the room – I was practically tearing my hair out, but at least it provided me with inspiration for this week’s Friday Fictioneers. I love ‘can I git a cake wrote on?’. 🙂 Thanks for dropping by Rochelle.
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Sandra, Good story with a type of dark humor. As a former teacher who taught reading and writing, I just hope they know how to read and write properly even though their work doesn’t always show it. I accept that work as a form of art, popular with some, but not with me. Well written as usual. 🙂 — Susan
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Don’t get me started, Susan. 🙂 The other day I saw a headline on a respected (in terms of standards, not politically) national daily newspaper here that said something like “Minister remains unphased by …” I was just about to share it on FB when thankfully it was taken down and a corrected version submitted in its place. I suppose that at least is gratifying – other newspapers remain ‘unphased’ by their errors. 🙂
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Dear Sandra,
News rapper. I love the concept. Never have understood why that format fought on….unless it’s just that people are….never mind. I often think the same thing as Mr. Penworthy regarding checking out of this world. Wonderful dialect, perfect sentiment.
Aloha,
Doug
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Hi Doug. My father used to say that last phrase a lot. It used to irritate me intensely, but I see where he was coming from now. Loved your offering this week – mega mate. 😉
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Unfortunately, I am with Mr.Penworthy. The things you hear on TV these days…Your story is very accurate.
As for the little blue devil, try to copy this into your post, under the text:
When I encountered the problem first time, I refused to sing in and looked around for another solution. So, I went to my older posts, copied the part with InLinkz script and just replaced the numbers with the new set of numbers that are visible every week when you click on Rochelle’s blue frog. Just be sure to change both sets of numbers. I think this should work. Hope this will help.
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It doesn’t show what to copy in my post above. 😦
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The problem is that Rochelle’s blue frog hasn’t been appearing so I can’t click on it. So I’ve no way of uploading a link unless I can remember the url for someone else’s blog that might show the blue frog. (Some do, some don’t) The Inlinkz code is on Rochelle’s page but then that requires me to sign in and go through a loop that sometimes has ended up at the links page, but other times not. When I tried to test it again last weekend, the sign in screen went to a message that said my password/user was invalid and to click for a new password. So I did, several times without any success – no communication was received back. And then the next time I tried I got logged in and everything proceeded normally. Everything looks normal today, but I just don’t feel up to pursuing the inlinkz code to put the blue frog on my page. Enough, as they say, is enough for now. Maybe next week. 🙂 Thanks for the help, and for commenting.
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Nevah giv up de fight, de-ah Sandra,
You got de spit, we hav t’hand ya.
(But what is da Meejah mean? i be lost wid dat word?)
Rand-ya
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Media Studies? Fewer and fewer kids over here are pursuing the sciences, languages or literature in favour of Media Studies. Oh… and Performing Arts too… Incidentally there is no ‘h’; in hand, not any more. Tanks for droppin’ by. Did I mention we don’t do ‘th’ any more?
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My sympathies to Mr. Penworthy. It’s “gawdawful” what you read and hear these days.
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Proper depressing! 😉
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When we reach that stage, I’m going to switch out the lights. Lovely name for a teacher, Penworthy – good creation.
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Me too. I had to leave the room during the F1 broadcast at the weekend. Thanks for reading.
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As they used to say
Back in the day
Class with a capital K.
Hee-hee! Really fun story, Sandra! I could read it fine, no problems. And I agree with Penworthy . Appropriate name I’d say.
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Yes, it’s a nice name for a teacher. 🙂 Thanks for reading Kent.
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You sound like me i.e. getting old and further removed from what’s trendy. I’m sure we’ll both agree it was better in our day 🙂
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Ahem! ‘Older’ I think. 🙂
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Ur story was amazeballs, obvs.
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Amazeballs schmazeballs. I have a gun and am prepared to use it… 🙂
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hahahaha.
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Ha! That is a fun write. The rapper newsreader… I wish it never comes to that.
An enjoyable read. 🙂
-HA
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Only a matter of time, I feel … Thanks for dropping by.
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Wonderful use of phonetics. It really fleshes out the character.
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Thanks Carol! 🙂
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Eats, shoots and leaves 🙂
SJ
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Indeed! 🙂
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Love his accent! lol
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Thanks Dawn. 🙂
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Great dialogue, loved the ‘news rapper’ 🙂
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How irritating will that be… when it happens. 🙂
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As someone who studied meejah as a mature student, I thoroughly enjoyed watching my teachers try to guide some of the younger class members towards a more standardised form of the English language. I loved your story Sandra, particularly the contrasting characters.
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Thanks Siobhan. 🙂
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I think you’ve opened up a whole new field of endeavor — news rappers. Here in the U.S. there are hours and hours of pointless repetitive local news (fires, car crashes, etc.) and people think they are watching “news.” It might as well be done by rappers.
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Sounds a bit like our Sky News over here Perry. 🙂
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while many have forgotten the habit of reading, now i understand some would not even learn to write, they would start with a keyboard
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I suppose that’s the same as only being able to ‘do maths’ on a calculator then.
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That was both hard to read and very entertaining. A great take on the prompt and one that makes me wonder how many teachers I might have driven to alcohol. 🙂
Cheers
KT
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It wasn’t that easy to write either KT! 🙂 I was unimpressed by my rap verse, until I remembered that rap is generally unimpressive. Felt a little mollified then.
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This made me laugh 🙂
Or maybe I shouldn’t, this could be happening when I’m retired 😦
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Undoubtedly! 🙂
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You have no idea how much the student’s dialogue sent a shiver down my shiver down my spine. Excellently written
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Oh I do Weltchy! 🙂 Thank you.
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for sure, the times they are a changin’
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So true. 🙂
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Your talent never ceases to surprise and delight me. I love that you are able to see the same photo as me and go in such intriguing and creative directions. This was great!
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Thanks Dawn. We seemed to be a bit heavy on the book-burning theme this week so I was glad I’d gone down the ‘language-annihilation’ route. Cheers!
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The stories were dark, in general. That’s for sure! But you’re always out in your own field, Sandra. 😉
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This is one reason I don’t have a television…I don’t think even sherry would get through a news rapper.
Great dialect.
Ellespeth
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The content of the news these days is enough to call for a large sherry, but if it ever gets to be delivered in rap…
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I’m with Mr Penworthy too. I notice your reply above that his last line came from something your father used to say. That’s very touching, and makes me think about how we have these little treasures of words, phrases, maybe images, in our memories of our parents or people in our lives. They’re precious memories. Your story’s very entertaining. I love it.
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Thank you Margaret. It seems that more of these memories spring to mind when you get older.
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I’ve just snorted while reading about your “unphased” Minister – I wonder if the Enterprise had him in a tractor beam? (Sorry to bring Star Trek into your space but I couldn’t resist!)
Very clever, Sandra, and to be honest, it makes me glad I don’t watch the news…. 😛
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Thank you. 🙂 The newspaper was The Independent, Joanna. So encouraging though to see the haste with which they sought to remove it from the internet. All is not lost.
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Not quite all, anyway. 😉
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Great idea Sandra, a really funny little story that had me chuckling out loud. 🙂
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For a minute, I thought he might be a hillbilly, but he talks too fast and that rhyming stuff really ain’t our style–xcept in cheating songs, of course.
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Thanks for dropping by Lucille. 😉
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Sad isn’t it? I no longer subscribe to cable and whenever I do see the newscasters today I want to bang my head against the wall! Great writing.
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I think the standard of television presenting in general has really slipped, but hey, what do I know. 😦 Thanks Leona.
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Ha ha. Loved the dialogue. This could be so true..it isn’t right? It’s fiction, yes?
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Oh! Save us all! This was a great take on the prompt.
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Great take on this prompt…I love the dialogue! 🙂
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Good story!
I actually think a news rapper would hold my interest more than some of the talking heads on Fox. But I agree with Rochelle that many of my countrymen/women speak as though English is their second (or third or forth) language. Their English teachers may have put forth a valiant effort, but couldn’t compete with their heroes, the pop-culture icons including rappers and singers whose words cannot be heard or understood.
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Dear Sandra, Recently, I read some letters written in the early 1800’s. The penmanship was beautiful and ornate as was the poetic verse that the author was writing about. It troubles me that we are “dumbing down” as a society. What will happen in the next hundred years would certainly be unrecognizeable by us if we were to come back. Your story is so well written Sandra, as everything you write is. Hope you had a good Thanksgiving (I know it’s unique to the U.S.) but it is a fun tradition to eat until you are miserable, dote on your grandchildren, and listen to the same old stories for the umpteenth time. It is enjoyable and delicious! Excellent story! Nan 🙂
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News rapper? Now that’s innovative 😀 I confess I can never quite know what to expect from you. But I know it will be great 😀
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Poor Mr Penworthy – feeling so bad and wishing his life away. Maybe he should get with the groove, after all, while it’s dire in sentiment and diction, ‘Fer a lickle bit more sorrow,/fink ‘bout comin’ back tomorrow…”’, is also very funny.
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