Only Words (Friday Fictioneers, June 2015)



copyright Raina Na

Your words are scattered like ice-shards on our bed.

People change… no-one’s fault…

They fall to the floor as I smooth the sheets, and I nudge the fragments beneath the bed.

I pluck my words from the pillow slipping them into my apron pocket.

Please don’t do this… please…

In the kitchen I shake your words from the tablecloth, as the dog snuffles amongst them, foraging for truths and toast-crumbs.

No-one else… well, no-one special anyway…

And on the dusty garage floor, I kneel to gather the words frozen to your lips.

Please don’t do this… please …

They’ll stay with me,  forever maybe.

I loved this kitchen the first time around; it has that ‘lived-in’ feel to it that you don’t see in today’s kitchens.  I think I might have written something lurid for this picture the last time around, something involving the unorthodox use of the kitchen table.  Either that or something whimsical relating to a grandmother – the pendulum of inspiration swings to either end of the spectrum for me sometimes.  But there are so many Friday Fictioneers submissions in my files I can’t find either, so something new for this week.  Hope all goes well Rochelle.  And thanks again. 🙂


About Sandra

I used to cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and wrote fiction and poetry. Now I live on the beautiful Dorset coast, enjoying the luxury of being able to have a cat, cultivating an extensive garden and getting involved in the community. I still write fiction, but only when the spirit moves me - which isn't as often as before. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
This entry was posted in Friday Fictioneers, Just Sayin' and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

69 Responses to Only Words (Friday Fictioneers, June 2015)

  1. Dear Sandra,

    I love the metaphor in this. The image of the dog snuffling, foraging for truths and toast crumbs is brilliant. I get the feeling things didn’t end well for the husband. Well done as always and thank you for the well wishes.




  2. Danny James says:

    Welcome back! Sad and power full.


  3. ansumani says:

    Nicely done mystery and beautiful metaphors.


  4. Packed a punch with 100 words. Powerful and sad.


  5. Indira says:

    Hi Sandra! Excellent as usual and very different take also.


  6. Oh.. we seemed to have been thinking along the same lines here.. Maybe you will have need for a batch of concrete that I have for sale.


  7. It seems a mix of prose and poetry. Whatever, it works really well. And yes, great use of metaphor.


  8. Dave says:

    I don’t think its particularly sad; except maybe for him.


  9. Somehow I can hear the words clanging together, see them dissolving on the dog’s nose, feel them cold and moist on frozen lips. Well done.


  10. This reads like poetry. So eloquent and powerful. I’ve been there. I know the feeling and you captured it.


  11. plaridel says:

    excellent as always.


  12. storydivamg says:

    I love the gathering here, Sandra. Nice work.

    If you find the other one, be sure to post a link. I always “mean” to go back and read previous stories from the Fictioneers I’ve grown to admire, but somehow it doesn’t seem to happen. Could that have something to do with the busy nature of my life as a small-business owner or one of a hundred other things? Yes. Resoundingly, yes.

    All my best,
    Marie Gail

    Liked by 1 person

  13. rgayer55 says:

    I loved this one, Sandra. I wrote a poem several years ago call The Seminar in which words were bouncing off people and walls and rolling across the floor, but they were mostly blah, blah, blah. You know how seminars can be. 🙂


  14. The kitchen feels lived in or died in depending on how you view it.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. wildbilbo says:

    Beautiful work with the fragments of words, snuffling for truths, frozen on lips… great.


  16. This is my favourite story of yours ever I think. Love it.


  17. Wonderful writing, Sandra. You say so much with so few words.


  18. It was worth coming back for. I’m glad I remembered 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  19. DeeDee says:

    Beautifully Written


  20. Norma says:

    Wonderful read, Sandra. I loved the idea of words, crumbs, dog snuffling – the whole metaphor thing in the story. It couldn’t be said any better than “Only Words”.


  21. phylor says:

    Amazing way to use words. The story unfolds nicely. Really enjoyed the read!


  22. Brilliantly written.
    Love the way you let us hear the husband’s last words.


  23. draliman says:

    Very nice, I love the thought of words as something tangible.


  24. mjlstories says:

    Powerful image. Whoever said words will never hurt me was so wrong.
    Glad you wrote a new one – on the other hand I’d read a story, probably a novel, titled ‘unorthodox use of the kitchen table.’
    Now I did include a grandmother – there’s something about that kitchen!


  25. Amy Reese says:

    Excellent, Sandra. Love your words.


  26. Very powerful and emotional writing.


  27. Maybe after the words have all melted away (if she lets them) she will be better off. Great use of metaphors!


  28. historieforteller says:



  29. erinleary says:

    Hauntingly beautiful. Loved the way you structured the story and how the desperation came through. Lovely!


  30. Sandra, you have a masterful way of making your metaphors so vivid and alive. I’ve always loved that about your writing. Wonderful story, as always.


  31. Liz Young says:

    I love the imagery in this – and the reprise of the words ‘please don’t do this’ is mastery!


  32. This images in this story portray so well the sharp cuts made by cruel words, when two people have fallen out of love. But I get the feeling, only the husband wants to play the game of wounding and she’s saying enough is enough, with her ‘please don’t do this’. Excellently written, as usual.


  33. Margaret says:

    Great use of metaphor, and I love the drama and suggestiveness of the ending. Great writing.


  34. subroto says:

    I loved the way this was done, with the words scattered around. And the deadly ending too.


  35. Nan Falkner says:

    AWESOME – just AWESOME! Nan


  36. afairymind says:

    Beautiful story. You say a lot in 100 words. 🙂


  37. i b arora says:

    nice play with words.


  38. Ellespeth says:

    Well this got me! The image of ‘truths and toast crumbs’ is one I particularly like – and that of words frozen to lips.


  39. Vinay Leo R. says:

    Different, interesting… a little mysterious… hmm! Excellent write.


  40. A masterful use of metaphor, Sandra. Looks like he pused her over the edge. Well written as always. — Suzanne


  41. I’m a little bit late to the party, but I loved how you interspersed the story with the mirrored conversation. Nicely done


I'd love to hear your views; it reassures me I'm not talking to myself.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.