Gone Shoppin’ – Friday Fictioneers, July 2016

Copyright Janet Webb

Copyright Janet Webb

 

It’s exhausting, pushing a trolley with a wonky wheel.

My sister, who unerringly picks the smooth glider, normally seethes at ‘Seasonal Goods’ while I’m still negotiating the corner between ‘Deli’ and ‘Organic Produce’.

She’s usually vitriolic.

“If it’s not a wonky wheel,” she’ll complain, “it’s one needing a good shunt up the backside to get it going”.

I’ll recognize, as she intends I should, the analogy to my choice of partners.

But today she’s beside me, distracted, thoughtful.

“Everything OK at home?” I say, cautiously.

She stops by ‘Canned Vegetables’.

“Not really,” she says, “I think the bloody wheels have fallen off”.

 

This week’s Friday Fictioneers prompt is from Janet Webb, a former regular at Friday Fictioneers.  Lovely evocative photo, Janet.  Thanks once again to the lady in aisle 5, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.  Long may she supervise the clean-ups there.  🙂 

About Sandra

I cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and write fiction and poetry. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
This entry was posted in Friday Fictioneers, Just Sayin' and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

49 Responses to Gone Shoppin’ – Friday Fictioneers, July 2016

  1. Lynn Love says:

    Haha! Lovely Sandra. Love how you’ve describe the sisters and their relationship through trolleys and the type of goods they buy. Love how they’re near ‘canned’ goods as we learn the sisiter’s life is not as smooth running as she might want folk to believe. Great tale.

    Like

  2. Love the analogy!

    Like

  3. ceayr says:

    Your observation and description of the human condition are unmatched, Sandra.
    And your analogies are brutally funny.

    Like

    • Sandra says:

      Thanks CE. You and I do brutality each in our own way. 🙂 Only joking, I look forward to visiting your slot each week, in that kind of ‘omg how’s this going to end’ way.

      Like

  4. Dear Sandra,

    What can I say? I laughed out loud. I can only imagine.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

  5. MrBinks says:

    Brilliant.
    I also had to pat myself on the back for knowing, from the first line, where this was going and for not being disappointed. Brilliantly played.

    (Oh, and also… Hi!)

    Like

  6. Sue says:

    Love the analogies…you are a great observer of character, Sandra

    Like

  7. Another beautiful character study, color me impressed. Loved it!

    Like

  8. gahlearner says:

    Perfectly wonderful.

    Like

  9. k rawson says:

    Marvelous take. Just like the cart is reflected in the water, their carts reflect their relationships.

    Like

  10. michael1148humphris says:

    I always wondered why so many people stop at canned goods.🙂🙂🙂

    Like

  11. Graham Lawrence says:

    I agree, lovely analogies and a great take on the prompt. Another fine tale.

    Like

  12. I do have TWO sisters and you caught the balance and counter balance beautifully.

    Like

  13. Flows easily. So constructed a life story can be read into it.

    Like

  14. I just had a visit with my sister and can say this has a true to life feel to it.

    Like

  15. Haaa!
    I love this story, so true of life and relationships.

    Like

  16. jwdwrites says:

    Sandra, you always write about relationships so convincingly. I always look forward to reading your posts. 🙂

    Like

  17. ansumani says:

    Lovely story …makes me want a sister 🙂

    Like

  18. Your observations on human relationships are always a treat to read 🙂

    Like

  19. wmqcolby says:

    100 words too few. The old axiom, “Leave them wanting more.” You did it! I keep imagining Nigel Lythgoe saying this, “Sandra, you’re an inspiration to us all.”

    I love the idiom of the “trolley with the wonky wheel.” 😀 Your dialogue is so realistic and the structure …. WOW! Nailed it!

    Five out of five “don’t forget the breads.” (that’s a local joke around KC, I’ll tell you later what it means).

    Like

  20. subroto says:

    Perfectly done. Life is all about pushing that trolley 🙂

    Like

  21. Vinay Leo R. says:

    Like how she still manages to make an analogy that the sister will understand, but anyone overhearing will be in the dark. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  22. plaridel says:

    great treat as usual. enjoyed it very much. 🙂

    Like

  23. draliman says:

    Oh dear! Love the analogy and great dialogue.
    I usually get the trolley with one completely jammed wheel 😦

    Like

  24. Laurie Bell says:

    Terrific last line. Change in behaviour singals something more. A great showing of sister relationships

    Like

  25. liz young says:

    Sisters – a pain in the arse but there when you need them!

    Like

  26. rgayer55 says:

    I never had a sister, and can’t say I want one now. There have been two or three shopping carts I’ve admired from afar, though I’m hesitant to reach out and start a conversation. I guess I’m just shy.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Interesting; like another commentor said, great that the sisters could find a code to communicate but I don’t get it.(Romance isn’t an area I’m informed in, but that’s out of the scope of this project ; perhaps another photo will prompt a story inspired by those experiences.)

    Like

  28. Margaret says:

    Very clever. The sisters’ relationship rings true, even though I read that you don’t have one. I don’t either, but I do have two daughters, and watching them in action is nerve-wracking – and an education in keeping my mouth shut. I love how you used the trolley image.

    Like

  29. That story is somewhere between funny and sad but leaning toward funny. Great comparisons, Sandra. The sister’s marriage must really be in trouble if the wheels have fallen off. Good writing as always. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Like

  30. Great! Love the relationship with the sisters and the way the dynamic shifts when the sister who is normally prodding is struggling. Fun piece on a serious topic.

    Like

  31. emmylgant says:

    Superbe!
    You lead us to compassion in that last line. Wonderful.

    Like

I'd love to hear your views; it reassures me I'm not talking to myself.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s