Copyright Dale Rogerson
I gave the giant teddy-bear to my niece; I was forty-one, for God’s sake, and I knew it came from his samples stock.
The size eight underwear… I kept it a while… hope springs eternal and all that – but when I tried to return it I discovered it was a discontinued line. Long since discontinued.
After he dumped me, he left flowers on my doorstep… garage forecourt stuff, three carnations, a wilted rose and much greenery.
Short arms, deep pockets, some guys.
I heard he had a heart attack later that week.
Probably trying to open his wallet.
If you thought you read something else earlier on, you’re not imagining it. I decided to change my story. 😉 The multi-talented Rochelle leads the Friday Fictioneers out onto the dance floor once again this week with a lovely photo from the admirable Dale Rogerson. Thanks to both.
castelsarrasin 
Yes, there is a way that seems right, but its end is destruction. And I have seen this many times in lives of others I have known.
Brilliant job, as usual, Sandra! Always a pleasure. 🙂
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I just chickened out and changed the ending Kent. I’m the mistress of the second thought. 😉
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In other words, you had another ending on the side, huh? 😀
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That’s my style, hon. 😉
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Haha! Love it!
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Brimming with angry character!
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Thanks for reading, Neil.
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She doesn’t seem too upset at her loss, I can’t imagine why?! 🙂
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No great catch, I’d say. 😉
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Dear Sandra,
I don’t know what you changed that last line from but I must say, to quote a certain British friend. is a cracker. Love it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks, Rochelle. 🙂 The earlier version of that last line had possibly a more earthier implication than the Friday Fictioneers are used to seeing from me. 🙂
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I’m always open to something different. 😉
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Ooohhh… now I wanna know….
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Superb tone to this piece. The asperity in her description is at odds with the lavish flowers, which really adds tension and gives you a great sense of this relationship. Excellent work.
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Thank you. 🙂 The relationship had, I believe, run its course.
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I loved your last line, couldn’t help laughing . 🙂Great story , Sandra.
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Thank you, Moon. 🙂
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Short arms, deep pockets – great line there. And the end was funny. Great take.
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I think it might be a northern England saying, Yorkshire to be precise. Thanks for reading Lata.
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Men always complain that women are mercenary when it comes to being given things. What someone gives is sometimes habit, sometimes means but sometimes a lack of commitment. I prefer the rare jewel that actually thinks about the gift and gets something fun and tailored to the recipient. Which your MC didn’t do, and it’s unsurprising when the relationship’s trajectory is a nosedive. Your details here really set out the deficiencies of the relationship, without a word about them. Well done.
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I think his motivation, as a Yorkshire man might say, was that these gifts ‘cost him nowt’. Thanks for reading Brenda.
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Oh, my…you may be the mistress of the second thought, but you’re certainly the mistress of a great ending, Sandra!
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Many thanks, Sue. 🙂
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😀
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This made me laugh. Well done. Could have been Bill in my story.
xx Rowena
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She’s not gonna miss him and his ‘generosity’.
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Not one bit. 🙂
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Yes, I was struck by that. Thanks for reading Rowena.
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I don’t object to a man giving a gift that costs nowt – if he’s skint – but just because he’s tight … 🙂 Love your tale, Sandra and the mean menu of gifts on offer. Time was all he needed to spend – time, care and attention.
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Perhaps his wife controls the purse strings. Now does that mitigate his behaviour or not? Hmmm
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Ha! Well, I’ll have to dwell on that one 🙂
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What a killer last line! Absolutely brilliant, Sandra. Loved the tone and the language here. Cheers, Varad
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Thanks Varad 🙂
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Oh man! Love what you did with this, Sandra!
Methinks she won’t be sad to let his “keeper” go… Love the term short arms, deep pockets – we use it here too!
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Thanks Dale. This was not meant to be a reflection on the beautiful flowers in your photo, you lucky girl. They just stirred my consciousness. 🙂
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Of course not!
And yes, I was most surprised and pleased to receive them. He is a persistent one and doing his best to court me!
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Lovely! I hope this goes whichever way you want. 🙂
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Let’s just say I am thoroughly enjoying the process!
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Oh Sandra, that was so bad you made me LOL
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Glad I could do that, Dawn. 🙂
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Ha! Size eight underwear – hope springs eternal. Love it!! Great take!
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Thanks Britlight. 🙂
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She’ll probably send him a bouquet of recycled flowers from someone else’s grave…that would be fitting.
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Perhaps that’s where his flowers came from… that never occurred to me.
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It didn’t occur to me, either, until I read Rochelle’s comment. Then I thought, well maybe, they filled the bench with flowers in his memory.
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three carnations, a wilted rose and much greenery – this sentence says a thousand things about this loser-man. What a great take on the prompt!
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It’s the thought that counts. And maybe there wasn’t very much of that. 😦
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Last line made me lol. Beautiful writing Sandra. Great take.
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Thanks Indira. 🙂
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🙂
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Love the cynicism in this, it really made me smile, sort of a been there done that smile.
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Yup. 😉
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This is a story that repeats itself over and over. You’ve told it with heart and empathy.
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Many thanks.
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Or maybe she slow-poisoned him 🙂 Superb take Sandra!
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Your villainery is worse than my villainery. 🙂
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In my defense I watched a movie just a couple of days ago where the guy does it 🙂
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She should be upset, sad. last line is funny but I still wonder why
Click Here to see what Mrs. Dash Says
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Do I detect a wee bit of bitchiness here? After all, there are two sides to every story! Guess their marriage was far from a teddy bears picnic!
Click to read my FriFic
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Thanks for reading Keith.
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Loved that last line! I shall store it away to utter at an appropriate moment.
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🙂 Feel free!
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Ha ha, made me smile 🙂
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Good grimly humorous writing! Especially the killer last line.
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Thanks Penny.
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Well I hate to raIse the thought 😑 but maybe he didn’t have enough “green” to be lavish with all the ladies he was romancing. Just possible.
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It’s a possibiity. 🙂
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I have a friend who keeps their money in a mattress. I’ll get them to read this…
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I used to work for a guy who could peel an entire orange in his pocket. And then there was the guy who used to unplug the electric clock when he left the room…
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Ha! Ha! That last line is a killer. (Note to self: start exercising those short arms).
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Thanks Subrotu. 🙂
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Ha ha – what a tale. Love the dismissive tone.
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Thanks for visiting.
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No thanks needed, Sandra, I read all the posts and try to comment on them all – technical issues notwithstanding. 🙂
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There is such a bite to this, but with smiling sarcasm. Love it!
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Thanks Sasha 🙂
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I always enjoy your work, but this has to be one of my favorites. Generally, the mistress gets better gifts than the wife, so I have to wonder what kind of garbage he was bringing home to her. Maybe she should have gifted him some spray lubricant to help get that wallet open.
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Thanks Russell, glad you liked it. 🙂
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I’m with the others, re that last line. It’s just hilarious. Also I loved the description of the flowers, as the sort from a garage forecourt, as I always think those bouquets look rather sad and cheap –hastily put together for a hasty purchase.
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They really are the most appalling apologies for a bouquet that I’ve ever seen. 🙂 Thanks for reading Sarah.
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Nice one Sandra.
Short arms, deep pockets was a favourite of my grandfather, along with ‘ he could walk under a door wearing a top hat that one’ – as a child it took a while to work that one out. Northern wit ‘eh?
Would have loved to read the original ending…
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I don’t remember that saying, but how graphic it is! 🙂 Good to see you around again.
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Love it. No sympathy due, no sympathy given.
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Hehehehe
I know someone like that.
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Love the ending, so funny 🙂
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Loved this!
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