Show You Love Me – Friday Fictioneers, June 2022

Copyright David Stewart

Nobody except me remembers how it started, though none of us will ever forget how it ended.

Poised on the brink, arms outstretched, head tucked, cheers echoing off the cliff faces surrounding the shallow pool, and his lithe body gleaming in the autumn sunlight.

Would he?

How would he not, I thought.  My brother would do anything to impress her.

Yet in the end she looked away when it mattered.

I see her sometimes when he and I visit the park.

She smiles…

crouches beside him…

touches his cheek.

And moves on with the rest of her life.

Thanks to Rochelle, leader of our group of writers, for finding time in what I know is a very busy summer schedule to keep Friday Fictioneers going week after week.

About Sandra

I used to cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and wrote fiction and poetry. Now I live on the beautiful Dorset coast, enjoying the luxury of being able to have a cat, cultivating an extensive garden and getting involved in the community. I still write fiction, but only when the spirit moves me - which isn't as often as before. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
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48 Responses to Show You Love Me – Friday Fictioneers, June 2022

  1. Reena Saxena says:

    ‘The shallow pool’ acquires new meaning here.


  2. Iain Kelly says:

    Ouch. I wonder if she feels any guilt? Excellent story Sandra.


  3. neilmacdon says:

    Just beautiful, Sandra. Such clever use of the white space


  4. Dear Sandra,

    I’m assuming that dive didn’t go well. Two kinds of shallow in this story. Well done…but that’s what I’ve come to expect. Thank you for your kind words and decade of support.




  5. Dale says:

    You leave us with so much to ponder. Love your stories, Sandra.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Vartika says:

    That’s heartbreaking. Good story Sandra


  7. granonine says:

    Oh! The heartbreak is palpable. Excellent story.


  8. pennygadd51 says:

    Oh, wow. Beautifully written, Sandra. You leave us with such a lot to ponder.


  9. msjadeli says:

    Pearls before swine… Why does it have to be like that.


  10. I knew where this was heading but I took the plunge anyway. I raised boys so this story hit home. I shutter at the what ifs.


  11. Sue says:

    Plenty to ponder on


  12. I read this twice, just to make sure i got the story, very clever use of the world shallow as a metaphor for her feelings towards him since the accident. Nice one


  13. plaridel says:

    if it’s not meant to be, it’s not meant to be. such is life.


  14. Such a sad tale, if only he’d only known how she felt about him.


  15. elmowrites says:

    As ever, you weave little clues into this story then tie them up at the end. I’m glad the sister stuck by him when that particular shallow pool had washed away.


  16. Bill says:

    I see so much here within so few words. Well done, Sandra, beginning to end.


  17. Patricia Clair says:

    Oh, wow. Nicely done!


  18. Danny James says:

    That didn’t go well did it.


  19. GHLearner says:

    Hos ‘nice’ of her to smile and touch his cheek. Beware of the shallow pools, either way. Great story, Sandra.


  20. He tried so hard to impress, but in the end she turned away. A sad story told in a powerful way as usual. Wonderful!


  21. Forestwood says:

    Skillfully written and it made me think of several possible explanations. Those are the best stories. I can learn much from how you wrote it. Well done!


  22. James McEwan says:

    When we are young, being fearless to impress our friends seems like fun. Unfortunately, some end badly. Well told.


  23. Margaret says:

    Oh such a tragic story. I’m in awe of the way you’ve revealed the outcome of his dive – her crouching down to touch his face – that’s all you give us. Amazing. And the last line is perfect.


  24. This gave me shivers!! Very evocative


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