A Chip Off The Old Block – Friday Fictioneers, October 2022

Copyright David Stewart

I’d said I probably wouldn’t make it. 

He’d said he’d take that chance.

So there he is, shaking out his raincoat, searching for me, taking that chance.

And here am I, on the mezzanine, behind a potted palm,

not making it.

All those reasons he had for leaving my mother…

they were the same reasons for not leaving me behind.

He didn’t care that much then.

And nor do I now.           

He’s waited 25 years to find out how things turned out for me.

I can wait that long again to let him know…

and probably then some.

Thanks once again to Rochelle for finding time in her busy life to launch Friday Fictioneers every week.

About Sandra

I used to cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and wrote fiction and poetry. Now I live on the beautiful Dorset coast, enjoying the luxury of being able to have a cat, cultivating an extensive garden and getting involved in the community. I still write fiction, but only when the spirit moves me - which isn't as often as before. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
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39 Responses to A Chip Off The Old Block – Friday Fictioneers, October 2022

  1. neilmacdon says:

    Brutal, true and heart-breaking, Sandra

    Like

  2. michael1148humphris says:

    Life in a nut shell …Change your mind girl, playing his way will continue the pain.

    Like

  3. Forestwood says:

    That is a powerful story, Sandra. Possibly familiar to many. Well done!

    Like

  4. Tannille says:

    What goes around, comes around. Potent story.

    Like

  5. Dear Sandra,

    I’d say he’s earned her disrespect. Her anger is tangible and understandable. Well done!

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

  6. Anita says:

    She refused to meet her father.
    She punished him in her own way.
    He will never know about her…

    Like

  7. Iain Kelly says:

    A small comfort in a small revenge and no longer playin git his way. Nicely done.

    Like

  8. msjadeli says:

    I don’t blame her, he sounds like a cad, but I know she still cares. Nice nuance in this one.

    Like

  9. pennygadd51 says:

    I do so enjoy your stories, Sandra. This is top class, I particularly like the way she’s hiding on the mezzanine, watching his waiting and eventual disappointment.

    Like

  10. granonine says:

    If she truly no longer cared, she wouldn’t have gone to watch him watching for her. She is conflicted, and with good reason.

    Like

  11. James McEwan says:

    I read this as a father who deserted his daughter. I can understand the apprehension and curiosity the daughter is conflicted with and shown here.

    Like

  12. Liz Young says:

    Not meeting him will only prolong the hurt – get it out in the open!

    Like

  13. elmowrites says:

    My favourite thing about this, by far, is that she cares enough to be there, not making it. I hope she can find forgiveness for her own sake. I suppose we never know the full stories of our parents, but he made his choices and withdrew hers.

    Like

  14. Bill says:

    A wonderful story, Sandra. While it is understandable and familiar for many, it is sad on many levels. 🙂

    Like

  15. plaridel says:

    he shouldn’t set his hopes too high. she wouldn’t forgive him for what he had done.

    Like

  16. I guess she gained some satisfaction from watching him waiting in vain.

    Like

  17. poetisatinta says:

    So well written Sandra

    Like

  18. Ah, sounds like a bit of payback time, eh?

    Like

  19. Ouch! Very well written.

    Like

  20. Dale says:

    Beautifully written, Sandra. As per, you have so many layers in so few words. I am even left to wonder if she half-hopes he does see her hiding…

    Like

  21. authorfleurl says:

    Wow. You go girl. So much said in just 100 words. Brilliantly written.

    Like

I'd love to hear your views; it reassures me I'm not talking to myself.

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