Coda – Friday Fictioneers, November 2016

coda

Martin peers through the swollen slits of his eyes.

Above him, the branches of a sycamore tree shift uneasily against a pearl grey sky, while his ears ache from the screeching of a dozen or more rooks, each registering their strident outrage at this intrusion beneath them.

The leaves surrounding him rustle as he tentatively flexes his fingers, wincing in pain.

They’d been big lads, from the sink estate north of the town, out for some fun in the suburbs, and he’s always been high on their agenda.

Not all bad news though.

This time his violin is way beyond repair.

Sorry to be late to the party; I’m always slightly flummoxed by musical prompts and this week was no exception.  But today I’m celebrating the return of unlimited broadband, (oh deep joy!) so I couldn’t miss, even though it’s not a very inspiring piece.   Thanks to Rochelle, the leader of the happy band of Friday Fictioneers once more, and good luck for the interview.  Knock ’em dead!

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About Sandra

I cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and write fiction and poetry. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
This entry was posted in Friday Fictioneers, Just Sayin'. Bookmark the permalink.

71 Responses to Coda – Friday Fictioneers, November 2016

  1. neilmacdon says:

    Gritty, with ironic humour, and wonderfully written, Sandra. Music doesn’t seem to be a problem for you or Martin

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  2. Iain Kelly says:

    Having struggled through piano lessons as a kid, I can understand his silver lining! Nice take 🙂

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  3. Ouch! But there is a silver lining.

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  4. Ha ha, poor old Martin, but the last line made me smile!

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  5. Interesting how you and Rochelle went for the same title, confused me for a moment, I knew I already read the story with that title. 🙂 That said, I love the direction you took, your Martin is such a reliable character.

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    • Sandra says:

      Ach! I’m one who’s always telling people to look at the titles, but in my defence I’m also the one who never reads any until I’ve posted myself. Thanks for reading and pointing that out.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. As a person with no musical talents and endless piano lessons, I can identify with Martin’s joy, not dismay, over the beating his violin took too.
    Good musical story, even if you did not feel inspired!

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  7. Mike says:

    Great piece of writing Sandra. Loved the ending.

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  8. When I was a child they decided to torture me in school, when they made me learn the church organ. Back then I would have been thrilled if something -anything- would have damaged the instrument. The last line made me smile.

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  9. Lynn Love says:

    Poor Martin! Problem is, he might have parents so keen they’ll buy him another! Oh, what we parents put our kids through … A great tale, Sandra – despite your misgivings 🙂

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  10. Good that it protected him, besides elevating him!

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  11. Had not thought of a broken violin as something good… but I guess it means he can go on doing decent stuff, like drinking beer and watch football…

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  12. Whatever it takes, I guess, but just quitting would have been much easier, wouldn’t it? Love the way the title foreshadows that story.

    janet

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  13. Mike says:

    I hope that violin was not a Stradivarius

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  14. Dear Sandra,

    I noticed your title right away. But the meaning fits both of our stories. In mine it was the end of a life. In yours, the end of violin lesson torture. Great minds think alike. I’m happy to hear you’re back to broadbandland. Wonderful story as always.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

  15. Dale says:

    So funny you and Rochelle both chose a title that was so specific! And yes, I know what you mean about not reading any others before writing your own. I do the same. So you’re definitely off the hook.
    Plus, could your stories be any more different? Methinks Martin is hoping his parents don’t foist another instrument on him…

    Liked by 1 person

  16. paulmclem says:

    Love the first 3 paras. Very clear and colourful picture painted of someone coming too after taking a beating.

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  17. draliman says:

    Ouch. Perhaps with no more violin he won’t be such a target in the future, as well as not having to practise every night.

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  18. Rowena says:

    A great take on the prompt. I particularly liked the last line.
    I picked up the violin as an adult 4 years ago and the instrument was my pleasure and my pain for the first two years but I finally broke through.
    xx Rowena

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    • Sandra says:

      I had a violin foisted on me. I must be the world’s most unmusical person. It didn’t rest me with long, but I managed to inflict a great deal of pain on the eardrums of those responsible for the foisting. 🙂 Thanks for reading Rowena.

      Like

  19. Oh no!
    That’s a high price to pay.

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  20. Lizy says:

    Poor boy – Mummy wanted him to learn!

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  21. Life Lessons of a Dog Lover says:

    Nice ending that made me smile. Now that’s how you see the silver lining.

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  22. plaridel says:

    if the violin was broken because he used it as a weapon to protect himself, it’d be worth it.

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  23. Ha! Really like this – great mix of pathos and black comedy. 😀

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  24. I’m not a great lover of the violin, so one less suits me fine! A great take and a delightful read.

    My little story is called The Orchestra

    Like

  25. wmqcolby says:

    I’d say for someone who gets flummoxed from musical prompts, you really delivered the goods on this one. Solid story. Kind of reminds me, though, of a running gag in Woody Allen’s Take The Money And Run where, as a really bad criminal, every time he fails at something, the people he tries to rob take off his glasses and step on them. 😀

    Five out of five cat guts.

    Like

  26. A wonderfully written account of the pain of playing an instrument from both prospectives, Sandra.
    Playing an instrument is so much better when one has a passion for it.
    Isadora 😎
    p.s. thank you for introducing me to the word: flummoxed

    Like

  27. mjlstories says:

    I love the twist! For every musician who makes it there are hours of untold agony elsewhere.

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  28. With hate crimes on the rise, here and in abroad, this struck a “chord.” Powerful imagery, Sandra.

    Like

  29. rgayer55 says:

    Good thing he didn’t play the tuba.

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  30. subroto says:

    Ha! Ha! Starts out feeling like a sinister gang hit and then the total turn around ending.

    Like

  31. dmmacilroy says:

    Dearest Sandra,

    Better and better with the years. Loved the rooks commenting on his intrusion. You are on my mind.

    Your,

    Doug

    Like

  32. Interesting story! That’s one way to get out of practicing.

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  33. Well, now I have to learn what CODA means.
    Thank you.

    Like

  34. Great story and twist at the end, Sandra. It would seem a parent wants him to take lessons and he’s glad the instrument is damaged beyond repair. It’s also a shame kids beat up on others. There’s far too much of that and the bullying which also often goes with it. Good writing as always. —- Suzanne

    Like

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