Nobody’s Perfect (Friday Fictioneers, June 2013)

Copyright E L Appleby

Scribbled out on the autopiste, hurriedly posted from the hotel.Β  It was touch and go for Friday Fictioneers this week – very difficult.

All the animals gave different reasons for exluding Heffalump from their species:

“You should be fiercer,” growled the Tigers.

“You should be taller,” said the Elephants.

“You should have a bit more neck” said the Giraffes.

“A flashier hide,” sniggered the Zebras.

Heffalump’s foster mother, who’d raised him after finding him under a gooseberry-bush resolved to help.

“He’s so lonely; perhaps I’ll ask God to create another exactly like him,” she said.

God obliged, and both smiled as Heffalump greeted his new friend with joy.

“Now he can start his own species,” cried Mama Heffalump.

God stared in dismay.

“Oops… you should have been more specific,” he said.

About Sandra

I used to cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and wrote fiction and poetry. Now I live on the beautiful Dorset coast, enjoying the luxury of being able to have a cat, cultivating an extensive garden and getting involved in the community. I still write fiction, but only when the spirit moves me - which isn't as often as before. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
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54 Responses to Nobody’s Perfect (Friday Fictioneers, June 2013)

  1. Lol..oh well, they can always adopt.


  2. Dear Sandra,

    I haven’t decided if you’re brilliant or demented. (I mean both as compliments.) Fun story.




  3. This story didn’t suffer from the speed at which you wrote it, Sandra. πŸ™‚



  4. ha – yes details are a good thing when dealing with species and the like
    hope your travels are wonderful


  5. Hannah says:

    Nice twist at the end! πŸ™‚


  6. 40again says:

    Oh I love this. Well done, still chuckling.


  7. Hannah – there was no twist at the end. Or, rather there was no untwisted part at the end in this case.Or, no part at the end. Wait – this is getting quite twisted.

    It was the end that God twisted up on, isn’t that right, Sandra?


  8. Ooops! (And MY “oops” was reading “autopiste” and thinking “autopsy.” Thought you were taking this in a more morbid direction!) Your story reminds me of “A Mother for Choco,” in which a little bird looks for a mother to love him, but all of the animals shun him for not being like them… until Mama Bear loves him and brings him home to her other children, Alligator, Hippo, and some other animal. Very cute!


  9. Jan Brown says:

    I literally laughed out loud at the end. Delightful!!!


  10. Nice twist, but I’ll go with the words from Jurassic Park: Nature always finds a way!


  11. nightlake says:

    Poor Heffalump. At least, he has got a friend and companion


  12. Shreyank says:

    brilliantly funny πŸ˜‰ πŸ™‚


  13. Trudy says:

    Haha! Made me laugh! Adoption, I guess – or find one of those mad gene splicing scientists I expect there’ll be lots of those this week.


  14. elappleby says:

    Love it! Will they find love, do you think, or just be friends.
    (Probably wise not to have a load of baby heffalumps running around the place, anyway!)


  15. vb holmes says:

    Too funny, Sandra–but I think you should follow up on Perry’s “words from Jurassic Park: Nature always finds a way!” We’re all curious to find out how that plays out.


  16. elmowrites says:

    Poor Heffalump – you seem to have made everyone feel for him and isn’t that the first law of writing a good character?


  17. denmother says:

    Oh dear. Major screw up! Really fun story.


  18. wmqcolby says:

    Hee hee hee! Decently and well-done for a trip on the autopista. My next trip to Europe, maybe I should try the inspiration.


  19. JackieP says:

    Oh oh. πŸ™‚ It’s all in the details!


  20. neenslewy says:

    Still laughing! What a great little tale – totally not ready for God’s twist at the end there. Delightful. Loved it!


  21. That’s a great ending. I guess exactly the same isn’t always the best thing. πŸ™‚


  22. unspywriter says:

    I really did LOL! Great use of the prompt and a sweet story, too.

    Here’s mine:


  23. Aw, Heffalump…. lovely tale, Sandra, and such a good ending. The “Oops” really is funny. And sniggering zebras – great visual!


  24. “Oops!” Funny!
    … I’m still not sure what an autopiste is, but I’m glad you were able to scribble something while on it. (Since I feel proud if I can stay upright on my skis on the piste, imagining you skiing down AND SCRIBBLING a Friday Fictioneer story whilst doing so fills me with admiration πŸ™‚ )


  25. kz says:

    LOL! what was God thinking. tsk3 well at least he’s no longer alone ^^


  26. EagleAye says:

    Haha! Nice twist at the end. That gave me a good laugh.


  27. petrujviljoen says:

    Laughed! Maybe Hinduism had a better idea? Check out my story. Similar theme.


  28. A fairy tale with a twist! Nicely done.


  29. Sarah Ann says:

    Lovely idea. Perhaps two heffalumps are enough for one world? That ‘Oops…’ is priceless.


  30. Good was probably wise… on the other hand he made gnus


  31. What a great ending. So cute.


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