Distraction – Friday Fictioneers, February 2016

Copyright Al Forbes

Copyright Al Forbes

Her shirt clings darkly, as she guns the car away from the nursery.

“…but we’ve not seen Stevie today, we assumed he was ill…

It had been Joe’s turn to drop him off. Where the hell was he?

Anger curdles into fear.

Joe’s been distracted recently, stressed out. You read about people disappearing… surely not with Stevie?

Working from home, perhaps? No car on the drive

She heads for Joe’s office, as an ambulance races by.

The horrified group surrounding Joe’s car say it all.

An old man… Joe…? stumbles towards her.

“I forgot, Karen… he was asleep in the back.”

Back home, I was out taking frosty pics early this morning – makes a change from sand in your shoes, I guess.  Thanks to Rochelle, Friday Fictioneers kicks off once again.  Catch her blog radio interview if you get the chance – worth a listen.

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About Sandra

I cruise the French waterways with my husband four or five months a year, and write fiction and poetry. I love animals, F1 motor racing, French bread and my husband, though not necessarily in that order.
This entry was posted in Friday Fictioneers, Just Sayin'. Bookmark the permalink.

36 Responses to Distraction – Friday Fictioneers, February 2016

  1. Dear Sandra,

    What a horrid thing to happen. Distracted indeed. The sad thing is that it happens too often. You’ve captured the panic and despair of both parents.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    PS thanks for the linking to the interview. 😉

    Like

  2. I think I have read of such stories… horrific what can happen in a sun-warm car… I just hope the ambulance got there in time… I love how you pulled the news into the story.

    Like

    • Sandra says:

      This happened to a prominent family in the town where we used to live in Spain. And you can imagine how quickly it would happen there – a cold country with a searingly hot sun.

      Like

  3. Carolyn Page says:

    It is so common, these days, there is a name for this horrible situation – Forgotten Baby Syndrome.
    You captured the panic and desperation so vividly.

    Like

  4. ceayr says:

    Yawouch!
    I am squirming here.
    Brilliantly done.

    Like

  5. Oh my, what a tragedy. Such a strong story, all the emotions layered perfectly.

    Like

  6. Goodness the tension in this! I leaned forward further with each line I read.

    Like

  7. Modern cars, so unsafe.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Dale says:

    I got chills up and down my whole body. This was so well written.
    This has happened too often in real life. I don’t know that I could ever forgive my spouse for such a thing.

    Like

  9. mickwynn2013 says:

    Chills and horror and finally despair. What a lot of emotions in such a short piece.

    Like

  10. This is horrible to imagine.
    Well written as always.

    Like

  11. ansumani says:

    Thank God that I didn’t come across such stories- real and fiction – when my kids were young. It would have me twisted up in nightmares. I can’t even imagine the pain and guilt the parents goes through.

    Great writing as always.

    Like

  12. Wow, this was frightening, alarming – plausible. Brilliant writing.

    Visit Keith’s Ramblings!

    Like

  13. Dee says:

    Excellent take Sandra, doesn’t bear thinking about. Modern life’s stresses and strains have a lot to answer for.

    Like

  14. rgayer55 says:

    Evidently, we’re a forgetful lot in Arkansas. It seems this happens 3 or 4 times a year in our state. They even post signs at the entrance of all the Walmart stores reminding customers of this danger. I don’t know how a person could live with themselves after letting this happen.

    A powerful piece, and timely, with summer fast approaching.

    Like

  15. gahlearner says:

    Heart-stopping tension, and heart-breaking end. You pulled me right in the way you hinted at the heat with her clinging shirt. I don’t know if spouses can forgive things like this.

    Like

  16. liz young says:

    Awful story well written enough to make me shudder.

    Like

  17. Indira says:

    I don’t know what to say Sandra. A nightmare for parents. Chilling for me. Beautifully written as is your style.

    Like

  18. Jan Brown says:

    What a twist! Unfortunately, this is a realistic horror story. Very effectively told, Sandra.

    Like

  19. Unbelievable how often it happens! Great writing!

    Like

  20. draliman says:

    What a terrible thing to happen. A moment’s distraction…

    Like

  21. penshift says:

    It’s gotten to the point were its illegal to leave children unattended in cars here. 😦

    Like

  22. This type of accident would always be a parent’s worst nightmare. Even a fictional story makes me cringe and your’s was extremely realistic. Well written as always, Sandra. —- Suzanne

    Like

  23. kathyd65 says:

    Tragic tale. I feel for them both. Nicely written.

    Like

  24. A devastating blow to both parents, for sure. I could feel the mothers anxiety and the fathers sorrowful emotions. An amazing write, Sandra, about a tragedy that will be a haunting nightmare.
    Isadora 😎

    Like

  25. Amy Reese says:

    What a horrible scenario, Sandra. You captured the despair of the parents and confusion very well. Nicely written. It happened once that my child was locked in a car. Luckily the fire department came quickly and the weather was mild.They told me that if it had been a hot day, they would have smashed in the window. In any case, it was a nerve-racking experience, but luckily not life threatening.

    Like

  26. I was just discussing a similar event with a good friend. Distraction can be deadly. You captured the frightening moment we have all had when we fear something bad has happened to a loved one. Very nicely written.

    Like

  27. rosemawrites says:

    Oh Sandra. You build the tension so well and your first sentence is just engrossing.

    Like

  28. Margaret says:

    A gripping story from start to finish. You capture the emotions perfectly. And the title is just right.

    Like

  29. rogershipp says:

    Powerful story…

    Like

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